arabwife:

I’ll get over it I just gotta be dramatic first

(via joshpeck)

nightrhain:

cipollakate:

nickthepigeon:

stealing-your-wife:

espeoradar:

samarajournal:

paulichu:

adriofthedead:

zzdigital:

What if someone got bitten by a vampire, but didn’t realize it. So then they go around and keep misidentifying all the symptoms, like

“Dude, you haven’t gone outside in a while.”
“Yeah, last time I went out I got this wicked sunburn.”

“Are you still up?”
“Yeah, I started bing watching this show on Netflix.”

“Dude, I’m seriously craving something right now.”
“Like what?”
“I dunno. Pizza rolls?”

“Why is it that you never come into my house unless I invite you?”
“Um, it’s called ‘being polite’…?”

“I tried cooking with garlic the other night and got this serious burn on my hand. I think I’m allergic, but all I’m getting on Google is vampire bullshit.”

“Dude can a mirror like… stop working or something?”

“Dude, why do you keep posting pictures of the floor?”
“…Those are meant to be selfies, I guess my camera must be broken.”

“Dude, I am all for you expressing your religious beliefs, but could you not wear your crucifix when I’m around? It really bugs me for some reason.”

“Have you ever noticed how cute bats are? like really noticed? sweet lil balls of fluff with wings man.”

“I want to sleep in a coffin…ya kno, for like… aesthetic”

“What’s with your thing about necks lately?”

“MUST YOU KINKSHAME ME IN MY OWN HOME”

“I looked up my symptoms on WebMD, and it says I have cancer.”

(via gleauxlita)

brainstatic:

We naturally put millionaires and billionaires in the same general class of person, but the only reason to do that is because the words are similar. Since these aren’t numbers we can actually visualize, it’s important to understand what a billion of something is. To travel a million inches, you’d have to travel from the Southern-most tip of Manhattan and go to the Bronx. To travel a billion inches, you’d have to fly from New York to Shanghai twice. A million seconds is a little over 11 days. A billion seconds is nearly 32 years. A million ounces is about the weight of a train car. A billion ounces is 4.5 Eiffel Towers. Use these to conceptualize what the difference between a millionaire and a billionaire is, and the absurd amount of wealth we’re talking about.

(via europa6)

insidiousmoonandry:

unregardless:

being rich would be so much fun, like aside from the obvious stuff, can you imagine going to a restaurant and being able to give your waiter/waitress a $500 tip for like a $40 meal? you could make people’s months without even trying

If only actual rich people thought this way instead of trying to pass shitty ass laws to fuck it up for everyone else

(via europa6)